Have I reached my final destination

Holiday’s are always hard for me and if you factor in the arthritis pain it’s downright unbearable. My bipolar is currently kicking my ass and has me in a depressive state and constantly thinking about ways to end it all because sometimes nothingness seems like the better option to pain and depression. I know I…

I found the problem

I’ve been down a lot the last few weeks and I finally figured out why. Apparently, I mistakingly stopped taking my Cymbalta and my body was going through withdrawals and being deprived of the medication is absolutely needed. I started taking it again a few days ago and I’m starting to fill a lot better. I…

Busted through a life wall

    I always knew that I was a little different from everyone else. I didn’t react the same way as most boys growing up. All I wanted to do is be loved or liked by anyone at all. My house was not what you would call a caring/nurturing environment. Don’t get me wrong I…

I give up

Dear God, The bible says you are in control of all things. You are a caring God. At least this is what the Bible tells us. Preachers get up in front of us every Sunday and tell us these things and say things like if life gets tough give it to God. But you see it’s not Sunday. It’s actually just…

Fighting Back Against My BiPolar

If you have Bipolar especially type II you know the lows of depression. For the last year, I’ve been trying to fight it without meds and let me tell you it has been a real struggle.  Sure, I don’t have the zombie feelings but I don’t really feel happy very often. It may seem corny, but…

Bipolar Relapse

It’s coming I can feel it. No matter how much I fight it or try to deny it, I’m relapsing into depression from my bipolar disorder. I’ve been feeling it for a few weeks that voice in my head that keeps telling that me I’m a failure. Completely worthless. That life is not worth living….

Not feeling good

Been off my meds since Christmas Eve and now I can honestly say I don’t feel well both physically and mentally. Not sure if there is a relation or if this is something else. All I know for sure is I wish I could just sleep forever…