I feel it coming, that dark spiral of depression that lures me in and then devours me. I don’t think I can avoid it no matter how hard I fight because it’s just to easy to let it take over and cover me with it’s mind numbing hold causing me to stop caring about the world around me and keep anyone from getting to close.
I’ve done it before so I see the warning signs that a major episode is on the horizon and right now I don’t really care. I find it hard to even function these days, it’s a miracle I’m even able to keep my thoughts working long enough to even post a proper blog post. My head is full of pain and sadness, I just want it to stop.
I guess I should try to find the good things that I’m thankful for but right now it’s just so hard. I don’t know what to do or what tomorrow might bring but I do know right now I’m having a hard time and Thanksgiving may have been the last thing I needed.